Rock. Sleep. Cry.

Failure!

Little Beaner Toot was NOT happy about mommy trying to change her sleep situation!

So, the usual plan is this (when I say usual, I mean it is the same action night to night down to the way I whisper in her ear to how I gently lay her in the crib)… One or both of us bath her/Prepare her for bed. I then sit in the rocking chair with LB. She lays on the Boppy (nursing pillow i could not live with out) as I follow the same night time ritual to get her to fall fast asleep. I sometimes need to pull out an array of creative tricks to seal the deal but for the most part, this is the way the first part of the evening goes.

Bean will typically wake any time between midnight to 3AM. At this time she just whines a little, one of us will go to get her and bring her in the bed (king size thank goodness) with us and she nurses to sleep. She will often times wake one-three more times through out the night (can not be specific because most of the time I don’t even remember) to nurse. We have been fine with this schedule/night ritual/sleep plan. Whatever you want to call it. Until the last week, I explained last night.

As I went into her room last night, I found Toot in crawling position waiting calmly for me to pick her up, change her and bring her in my room. But this time, after the diaper change, I sat down in her rocker and tried the new plan. … Uh… I wish I had a camera on her at this moment. Lo looked at me (did not even start to nurse yet) and just stared into my eyes. Her hands loosely together fidgeting, eyes stuck on my every movement, this little girl wanted to know “why the hell are we sitting here and not going into OUR bed?”

This lasted for what seemed like 20 minutes. She finally nursed. Fell fast asleep and I stood up, placed her sweet little fat ass into her bed. NOPE. She was not having that.

Cry
Rock
Sleep
OUR Bed
Kick (not sleep)
HER bed
Cry
Scream
Cry
OUR bed
SLEEP……Finally FUCK.

She then slept the night away until the morning.

Now, what is my plan tonight?
I have no damn clue.
Any suggestions?

sleep weaning & sleep training?

If you have spoken with husband or my self, you know that LB sleeps in her bed from 8ish until anywhere from midnight to 3AM. He & I like her in our bed after this first wake of hers. We enjoy her laying with us for some of the night. We love knowing she is safe. We love mornings waking with her next to us. We love to hear her little breath in between us.

But there is this little problem...
(is she fucking serious, ((my question @ 4AM) )She has began waking up in the middle of the night screamingcryingpissing(the pissed off kind)fussing the last week and it is really starting to test my patience and creating anger within my body.

I suppose it is time to sleep train/night wean. (I admit while I quietly weep inside)

I am not sure if I am really ready for this. At the same time, I am really in the need of sleep for longer than three hours at a time. I'm torn. (trying to be less dramatic)

I think it is going to be along night.

To husband, please forgive me. I will be a BITCH and short tempered the next few days due to lack of sleep.

To drivers on the road, be glad you can not hear my profanity from the inside of my car. I WILL be cursing you.

To any one in contact with me in the next few days. Please be patient, I will HATE you and all your short comings without forgiveness.

Ten reasons why I love Husband

There are many more reasons; this is just the ten of the moment.

1. He Supports me in ANYTHING I want to do.
Weather I want to learn to sew, play the piano, attempt to garden, grow my hair out, try this blogging thing, get thin, learn about wine or become a doctor, he will tell me “Go for it Baby”. All the while cheering me on and supporting me in any way he can. He says “anything that keeps you busy and happy, I’m all for it”. I love him for that.

2. He makes me a better woman/mom/wife.
When I meet him I didn’t recognize my self anymore. His meaning and morality surprised me. I didn’t think there were humans like him. Because of him, today I am proud of my choices, my mothering, and my ability to be a good wife. It is my daily goal to be a better woman/wife/mother. He thinks I’m doing a ‘hell of a job” and so do I. I recognize my self today. I love him for that.

3. He calls me HOT STUFF.
Husband likes to tell me when he thinks I look good. This encourages me to stay healthy, get up and put me self together for the day, & try to look good for him. I want him to find me attractive till we leave this place. The more he tells me he likes what he sees, the better I feel about my self. I love him for that.

4. He loves his mother.
We all know the saying. “How a man treats his mother is a good sign how he will treat you.” Husband loves and respects his Mama as well as each of his family members. I have fallen in love with his family bond. It would be lovely for all families to be like his. I love him for this.

5. He shares my love in nutrition & cooking. (Even if he does eat animals)
Some would say my idea of how we should cook for our families is “high maintenance”. (He might even say that, ha) Yet he thrives to cook a meal every night of the week like I do. He gets excited on the weekend thinking and researching the tasty meals we will cook. That is so sexy. To watch this man from start to finish attempt to keep the kitchen clean, (because that is the way I like it) to attempt to master time management in hopes to have each component be ready at just the right time, to see him cooking for me and for our family is simply lovely. I love him for this.

6. He keeps his hair long and keeps permanent facial hair because I love it.
The fact that Husband does things because “I like it” makes me smile. I love love love his long hair. It is just a HOT MESS. I love his face with scruff. And he hasn’t cut it since the day I told him this. Now that is love in this fucking Texas heat. I love him for this.

7. He looks hot doing a push-up.
Husband likes to stay in shape. This naturally attracts me to him. I like to watch him do push-ups. His arms & back are sexy. I love that he works out. I wish I could watch him body build all day…. Psh.. ok, that would be a little gay. But it is nice to watch him do push-ups. ☺ I love him because of this.

8. He opens the car door for me EVERY time.
This man is old school. (In the good way) He is not so traditional that it gets degrading; it is just the right amount. He loves that I make him coffee every morning, that I do the laundry, that I am home when he comes home and I love that he opens my door, takes out the trash and gets bugs out of the house. I love him for this.

9. He has NEVER been disrespectful to me.
Husband should write the damn manual on “How to be a Man & How to love your wife. He NEVER yells at me. He NEVER says anything nasty to me. He NEVER gives me an unkind eye. He NEVER looses his cool with me. He simply loves me. And it shows in every word, every kiss, and every action he takes. This is just amazing to me and it might just be why I married him. (Well, reason number one.)

10. His name is Jim.
Jim & Jenn. It sounds good together right. Ha. Yep. Duh.

I love Husband.

Ps. Lola Beaner Toot just took the biggest shit of her life so I need to go tend to that.

cutting a tooth

Dah dahh,

I just wanted to tell you that I can not wait for our time together this weekend. I am excited to see a new part of Texas with you and Mommy and Sissy at Lake Palestine.

This week has been busy. I played with Mama while my teeth are slowly coming in. Sissy had a pool party that MaMa wanted to go to so I stayed at the house with Aunt Shannda. I love her and love Aleese so much!! She is so silly.
Mama missed you while you were at work. So do I. I want to have lunch with you more often.

We play a lot while you are at work. Want to see the photos??




I know you are proud that I cut my first tooth, but I am not so happy. The tooth hurts as it is growing in. Im sure I will have a lot of distractions this weekend.

Well, I will sleep with you tonight then see you after you get there tomorrow.
I love you, more than anything in this world.. other than mamas tit.

Duh, Love lola beaner toot.

Times are a changin

Things have changed so much with this little bean girl.
Her head is so much bigger.
She falls asleep in a new way.
She wont sleep in "baby cradle." She likes to face outward.
She is content with her self for longer now.
She will sit in a bouncer or on the bed for a minute longer.

Priss is getting stronger.
She is having 3 hour Gymnastic practice twice a week!!!
She is doing hand stands, back up circles, and back handsprings.
Come see her. She loves spectators!!!!!

We will be leaving both of them in two weeks.
I'm worried about it.
I hope they will be okay.

I love them both so much.
Priss is such a good big sis.
Beaner toot is in love with priss.

This is what I wanted it to be like.
Bliss.

Hooray for girls.

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She eats feet